Have you ever had a Time in life when you know that God is trying to tell you something, but you can't define what?
You wonder what the signs are supposed to be. Or are they even signs?
Well, here is my odd predicament that I just can't figure out...
It has been going on for years too.
It started about eight years ago, when my husband and I took our first trip without the kids. We planned everything to a T (in my normal, perfectionist manner) but while in Mexico, one of our lined up caregivers got pneumonia and ended up in hospital. One of my largest memories of that time in Mexico, was worrying about my children, because my plan for them did not work out. I also worried about the caregivers, that they would burn out. (cause my kids were young, and a handful! :) )
The enjoyment of the trip was definitely squashed by this inconvenience and added worry. That was the first time, and I didn't think anything of it...
Then......wait, that is not entirely true, my husband and I did say on the way home from that trip, "maybe we are not supposed to travel without the kids."
So, the next time that we tried, four whole years later, we left on a bus trip to an NFL game.
Wouldn't you know it, our first night there, one of our children fell and bit through his tongue. I still remember the phone call, with the child crying and in pain, and about the blood... We had taken a bus to our destiny, so there was no running home early. So once again we sat through the remainder of our time away, worrying about the children.
And the time away that was supposed to fill our souls on that break, was unattainable.
Again, we said to each other once home, "we really are not supposed to go anywhere without our kids"...
Then, I kid you not, almost exactly four years later, we bravely decided to give it a try again...
We bought tickets for a wonderful live concert, and booked non-refundable hotel rooms. This time, the travel was just to the other side of our state, so that we wouldn't be too far away. In case the inevitable might happen.
Unfortunately, this 3rd try was just last weekend. And wouldn't you know, on the day we were supposed to leave, we had a child on his 6th day in bed with influenza; on his 6th day of a high fever. And it didn't look very promising that he would miraculously snap out of it once we left...
So, we very reluctantly cancelled our trip. We tried everything that we could too cancel the hotel, but knew it was non-refundable when we booked it. We also tried every method known to us to sell the expensive concert tickets, starting 48 hours before the concert, and still no luck.
There were seats at that awesome concert with no one in them.
Now, these things that happened, the injuries, illness, and money lost, are not that big of a deal. They certainly aren't major life events or anything. But they were enough to dampen our trips, in different ways each time.
And what about the consistency; every four years we try again to go on a trip, and every time, something happens to decrease our enjoy-ability or to make the trip unrealistic all together.
What is that about? I find myself on this, "third time is the charm", round, of this repeating life story.... I keep wondering, what the heck is God trying to tell me? What message am I supposed to be getting from this repetition of events?
There's got to be something, right? Is it that I'm not supposed to leave my children behind? Is it that I'm not supposed to spend money on trips, and God wants me to stay home and give away more of my extra?
Is it that my husband and I are supposed to learn how to reconnect and renew within our own home or our own town?
I don't know. But I do know that it has been frustrating!
So I looked into God's word to see if I could find an answer there...
Proverbs 16:9
"In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps"
In Matthew 16:24, Jesus insists that if anyone has a plan to follow Him, "he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me".
Dave Keehn says in his Blog post titled When God Changes our Plans, "That is why, when God changes my plans, I must refocus my mind, asking what is God's design for this moment"
And Dave Keehn concludes, "When God changes our plans, look for His blessing of something new and unexpected. While the pain of loss may be very real, God's grace is sufficient to carry us into His next steps for our lives."
Well, those are beautiful passages, and although they make me feel a bit better, they do not explain to me the reason why.....
But, I remain convinced, that there is a reason for these repetitive occurrences, and in God's time, He will reveal the lesson to me!
In God's time, He will reveal the lesson to me! Click to Tweet
In the meantime, at least I have developed a new level of appreciation for God's timing, and I wait, expectantly, to find out what His plan has in store for me (and my family) next!
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